Are you struggling with weight loss too?

Ok, ladies, let’s be honest here. We know what we’re supposed to do, right? Eat right, exercise, stop pigging out on potato chips on the couch when we get home from work, lift our enormous butts delicate frames up onto some piece of exercise equipment, and so on and so forth.

I work at a college and I can’t tell you how depressing it is to see these teeny tiny 18-22 year olds walking around in shorts that probably wouldn’t even fit on me past the point of my knees. My feet are bigger than their entire bodies! My forearm has a bigger pants size, for crying out loud! I’m surrounded by it all day long. The only solace for me is knowing that ONE DAY these cutesy little girls will balloon. Yes, sweetheart, you keep on ahead sucking down those Starbucks White Chocolate Mochas that have over 300 calories in them … your metabolism will change one day … mwuh ha ha ha!

Ok, evil laughter aside, what is so hard about all this weight loss stuff? I’ve been doing a program called Spark the last few months (sparkpeople.com) and I just can’t seem to get it in gear. Spark is cool because it’s free and it’s totally down to earth: make smart food choices and get your butt off the couch. But I seem to have problems with both of those things! Does anyone else sit at a desk all day only to feel exhausted when they get home? Does anyone else have a BRAUMS ICE CREAM & DAIRY STORE humiliatingly close to their home or work? Yes, well maybe not the Braums, but I’m sure many of you do. Plus, there are health problems to contend with … for me it’s my knee, my TMJ headaches, and my strange magma chamber stomach.

So, what’s a chubby girl to do? Well, I needed to lose 100 pounds to be at my goal weight of 170. I’ve lost 50 of it … but it’s taken 3 years to do that. Does it have to be fast? No, I suppose not. What I started doing in the beginning was walking my dogs. Just around the block, nothing major. Then, as I felt more and more energy, I started recording those Gilad workout episodes on Fit TV and doing them when no one was around. Finally, I was able to muster up the nerve to go to the gym. I picked a local women’s only gym and it was better than I expected. There were ladies of all shapes and sizes and ages and I felt more comfortable than I ever had.

But, it’s always been a challenge for me to make those first steps … getting up and deciding to exercise, especially with the health issues. There are lots of days when the headaches, knee pain, or stomach pain win and I don’t do anything. But, like I said, as long as you stick with it over the long run (at least getting weekly exercise, if not daily) I promise it WILL pay off.

Then there’s the food! Who doesn’t LOVE cheese fries, hamburgers, PIZZA (aka the DEVIL), soda, CARBS, SWEETS, (OMG, I’m getting hungry thinking about it)! At my office, this lady I work with brings in the MOST amazing brownies. Oh, god, they literally are TO DIE FOR. You’ve never had anything so decadent. Or maybe your dinner plans suddenly change and instead of being able to make that healthy dish, you have to rush to get something unexpected (PIZZA!)? Dudette, those things happen! Life happens! You want a brownie made by beelzebub himself? Take it. The trick is to just have one (or even half of one if you’ve got nerves of steel). Pizza (oh lordy, I love me some pizza) … make it yourself or order the medium instead of the large (but don’t forget the breadsticks!). I believe there is a HAPPY MEDIUM!

Here are some concrete ideas to get started (these are things that helped me):

- walk around the block (take your doggies!) or take the stairs once a day instead of the elevator

- your kid’s got a Wii? Go get Wii Fit, or do some of the Wii Sports games.

- DVR or TiVO that workout show and try it out.

- Substitute! Here are some things you can replace: splenda over sugar, light mayo over mayo, fat-free or low-fat cheese instead of regular cheese, skim milk (SMART BALANCE milk tastes great!) instead of whole or 2% milk, frozen yogurt instead of ice cream, wheat bread instead of white (Sara Lee makes a great 45 calorie per slice whole grain bread).

- make more of your meals at home. Homemade pizza, homemade burgers, etc. Try sparkrecipes.com for some great ideas!

- take a walk during your lunch break.

- don’t have time to make lunch ahead of time? Lean Cuisine and Healthy Choice taste a lot better now than they did even a few years ago.

- buy the 8 oz cans of soda. (I CANNOT function without Coca-Cola, so this has helped me a lot. I went from several 12 oz cans per day to just one 8 oz can).

- hide healthy snacks so you’ll have them around in a pinch. Sneak a couple of small baggies into your car or desk … air-popped popcorn, a serving of nuts or trail mix, a piece of fruit).

- oh yeah, that last one reminded me … eat more fruits/veggies. This has been hard for me because of my boiling cauldron sensitive tummy. Bananas are good if you have an evil stomach like me. I heard a quote once that sums it up nicely: “eat food, not much, mostly plants”.

Good luck out there!

You think YOU have a bad job …

I caught myself absolutely engrossed in some random person’s resignation letter from Whole Foods yesterday on Gawker. The letter went on and ON about how screwed up things are there … with coworkers, managers, and even company philosophies. It got me thinking about all the things I’ve seen in my working life and how some of them make the Whole Foods guy’s life look comfortable.

I once worked at a place that sold health-junk. Not like Whole Foods, mind you … think more along the lines of Herbalife or Avon. Independent sales people and all that jazz. But, luckily, I didn’t have to worry going door-to-door; I worked in the warehouse. I saw them fire a girl when they found out she was pregnant and I saw them threaten to fire another girl because she was letting her brown hair grow out (it had been dyed blonde) and they didn’t like it that her roots were showing. They had a strict dress code of all black, even in the brutal Oklahoma summers.

I worked at another place that had a firm attendance policy. Any more than three absences in a three-month period garnered a written warning. I’d been working there for several months and hadn’t missed any time. I became ill and called in sick … first time ever. When I returned to work, doctor’s note in hand, I was given a written warning. I said, stop, hammer time, wtf, why am I getting a warning, this is my first absence? I was told that 35 other people had called in sick the same day I did and management had decided to write everyone up. Oh, and if you don’t sign the write-up, we’ll fire you. Lovely.

Same place as above also had a firm “stay in your gd seat” policy. If you were away from your desk for more than 5 minutes, you could get a written warning. So, skip that lunchtime burrito and make sure you have pepto in your desk ’cause you aren’t taking a sabbatical to the bathroom anytime soon.

Same place again – my nice Ikea containers my Mom bought for me in hippie-land California got stolen out of the fridge. Another place I worked at briefly closed the blinds and made employees continue working when a tornado passed ever-so-gently by the building. The tornado-place told me when I was hired that I would be working a part-time shift, but training would be full-time hours. No prob … I needed part-time to go to school, but school wasn’t starting for a few months, so I had plenty of time for the training. When training was almost over they handed out schedules to everyone. Mine was full-time …. wait a sec, I signed up for part-time. The wicked witch of the West hiring manager then explained to me that they don’t have part-time positions.

So, I guess all I really have to say to Whole Foods guy is: suck it up man! The world is full of crap jobs and crap people who run those crap jobs.

Got any terrible work stories … vent them to me in the comments!